Dear Mums of the world,
Well done you. Well done and thank you for all that you do! From the moment you wake up to the second your tired head hits the pillow, you’re out there being a hero. Whether you’re a single mum, or you’re parenting as a team. Whether you’re a stay at home mum, or you go out to work, you’re a badass. You keep little humans alive. You not only keep them alive but you make sure they are fed, safe, happy and loved. Do you know how many kids out there go without food, without shelter, without love and safety? But you’re here, giving your kids everything you’ve got. Making sure that no matter what, they are surviving. And even for the mothers out there who are struggling to give their kids what they need, YOU’RE TRYING!!!
You may have bad days, you may have the worst days. You may have days where you feel like your life is nothing but dealing with crying kids and utter stress or the house is a mess and you can’t juggle everything all at once which makes you question whether or not you can handle motherhood. But you’re doing your best and you need to tell yourself how amazing you are! You CAN handle it. You ARE handling it and you will continue to handle it. It doesn’t matter if most days you’re snapping and your kids or snapping at your husband because you’re overwhelmed, that’s life, but you are rockin’ it and you should be proud of yourself. You may be talking yourself off ledges every other day, you may be questioning your parenting skills or questioning why you even had kids in the first place, but that’s what motherhood is. It’s fucking hard! It’s wonderful and quite possibly the best feeling in the world, but it’s also hard!
Some women out there want to be told they are beautiful, that they are gorgeous or successful and wonderful. As a mother, the biggest compliment I can get, is being told I’m a good mum. It’s something we don’t hear enough as women. It’s something we need to be telling each other every day. As women, we need to support each other more. Men are great and they try their best, but let’s face it, they don’t understand when we need to find an outlet. When we are stressed out and need to vent, they don’t handle us very well do they? They don’t understand as much. And women that don’t have a partner to vent to, it’s hard for them. To any man reading this, I’m not trying to emasculate you, I know you all try your best to understand but it can be hard.
So if you’re a mother, and you have other friends who are mothers, give them a compliment. Tell them that they are doing a fantastic job!!! Make them know that they are appreciated. Because as women, we tend to feel underappreciated. From the moment we give birth, after carrying our babies around for 9 months (WHICH BY THE WAY FUCKING HURTS), we then have to tackle the horrible emotions that come after childbirth. Even if you don’t suffer those sad emotions, the ups and downs of parenthood will wipe you out enough. We need to look after each other. We need to build each other up.
As women, there should be no judgments. There should be no comparisons. There should be no competition on who has it harder. It doesn’t matter if you stay at home with the kids, or sacrifice precious time with them to earn a living for them, you’re all wonderful. You’re all amazing. Breastfeeding mums or bottle feeding mums. Whole families or coparenting families, it does not matter, YOU ARE ALL THE BEST!!!
For every woman out there that is struggling, or is stressed, or just feels underappreciated and wants to be told she’s doing well, take a second to breathe each day and pat yourself on the back. You are doing a fine job and don’t tell yourself any different. You may have tears streaming down your face because you just snapped at your kids for the 100th time today. You may look in the mirror and not recognise yourself because of the bags under your tired eyes or you may feel like you want to give up, but don’t. You deserve to know how wonderful you are. We are told that parenting is such a wonderful thing and that we should appreciate every moment (which is true), but that’s hard when every day parenting stresses come in to play. You don’t always feel happy, you don’t always feel amazing, you don’t always have that confidence. And let’s face it, parenting knocks your confidence doesn’t it? I have 3 kids and I’m more insecure now than I was before I had kids. I never feel good about myself, I never tell myself I’m doing a good job, I’m always picking faults and hiding behind insecurities. But I’m not going to anymore.
We are mums. We are raising tiny little humans that drive us to the point of losing our minds and just when we are about to lose our minds, they do something cute, to remind us how adorable they are and how much we love them. Adorable or not, parenting is hard. Parenting isn’t just a job we can clock in and out of. Parenting is something we have to do 24/7. “Mum brain” is a thing. We are tired, we lose hope, we lose ourselves, we lose our confidence, we lose a lot. We sacrifice our bodies and youth to raise kids…
..But it’s completely and utterly worth it. It really is. Because having the pleasure of having your own tiny little human running around, becoming a mini version of you, growing up and learning all that you’ve taught them, that’s the best feeling in the world. Each and every milestone, it’s such a pleasure to experience.
My advice to you, is don’t lose yourself. Don’t be down on yourself. Enjoy every moment and even when you’re up at all hours of the night, sacrificing that beauty sleep, take a deep breath and tell yourself you’re doing just fine. Because you are. We all are. We are all amazing. We all need to celebrate each other and have each other’s back!!!
Take care of yourselves,
From another tired mum x
This blog was inspired and fuelled by my amazing friend Emily who is always my rock when I need her and is also the strongest, most badass mom out there!!! ❤
And I can’t not shout out to my wonderful friend Robin who is always all ears whenever I need to vent! Even when she’s busy being a superhero for her own family ❤