Send Your Kids to Bed, Feeling Loved

It seems like as time goes on, parenting is becoming more and more stressful. As more and more families are splitting up, causing more parents to become ‘Single parents’, both parents having to work because the economy is terrible and other life stresses that come our way, it’s hard to keep our patience when our kids are acting up. Trust me, I know.

I’m a single mum of 3 kids and although they are my world and make me so unbelievably happy and proud, they drive me absolutely insane. It’s so damn hard having 3 kids and sometimes I lose sight of what’s important by focusing on how stressed I am or how hard things can be. My day to day routines are insane. From the moment I wake up, to the moment I go to sleep, I’m on the go. Never without a moments peace. Between school runs, baby crying in the car because she hates car rides and my toddler moving at sloth speed and answering back, I’m drained by the end of the day. It’s hard. So when a child is misbehaving, it’s very hard for me to want to be nice to them. Sometimes I stress out too much and show them my nasty side. Sometimes I say things I shouldn’t. Sometimes I slip up and swear. Sometimes I make them cry because I’m frustrated at them.

For example: the other night, after telling my kids not to go on my laptop, when I finally got the baby to sleep and went downstairs, I came down to a broken laptop. My son had spilled orange juice all over it. I was devastated. I was so angry at both of them for playing on it, and I lost my temper!!! I said some pretty nasty things because I felt such a rage over their ignorance towards my no laptop rule. I know they should face some sort of punishment for ignoring me….

But then I realise, kids aren’t supposed to grow up with parents that are on edge all the time and I should think about how I react to certain situations. They aren’t supposed to feel every stress I have. They don’t need to hear every bad word I have to say. Kids are kids and they will drive me insane half the time, it’s kinda their job to. It isn’t their fault. I don’t want my kids to grow up with anxiety. I don’t want my kids to think they in trouble all day every day. I don’t want to be that mum who hits the roof so easily. It isn’t fair on them. Kids are supposed to be built up. They are supposed to have confidence fed to them by their parents. They are supposed to feel bright and happy and positive.

This is where I try to redeem myself

There is one thing I do at bed time every night for my kids. I feed them positive energy. I tell them everything great about themselves. How clever they are, how kind and loving they are, how gorgeous they are and how proud I am of them and so on. I list all the things they are good at! Everything positive I can think of, I feed it to them before they rest their heads and go to sleep. I do it so they end the day, knowing how loved they are and how wonderful I think they are. That although sometimes we have hard times during the day, they aren’t being carried to bed with us. I do it so they wake up knowing they are loved and that even though sometimes Mummy isn’t always perfect, she thinks the world of them. I do it because I want my kids to be confident. I want them to know their worth. The world is filled with people who will try to drag them down, but I will never be one of them. Our relationship will never be unhealthy, because I will never want them to suffer in life. I want nothing but the best for my kids. I want them to go out into the world and own it. I want them to have confidence in themselves all throughout their childhood, and adult life. I will never be that parent that kills my kid’s confidence. I even say these things to my 6 month old, who has no idea what I’m saying, but I want that positive energy to go to her too.

I think about how many kids out there, go to bed feeling unloved and it breaks my heart. No child should feel unloved. No child should feel scared or lonely. No child should have parents that knock them down emotionally. No child should ever have to be told they are annoying or dumb or stupid or ugly or anything negative. Every kid should feel loved. And my kids need to know that although I’m not perfect, I’m always going to love them and have their back.

The smile on their faces as I’m telling them how amazing they are every night, is priceless. Such a beautiful sight. It’s a smile of understanding how much their mum loves them. It’s a smile of knowing their worth. It’s a smile of feeling happy and proud of themselves. It warms my heart to see them acknowledge how amazing they are and appreciate that they are loved so much.

So if you have children, try this with them. Build them up every night before bed and even in the morning before school. Tell them how great they are and how proud you are of them. Watch their little faces light up. Every single child out there deserves to know how wonderful they are. No child deserves to go to bed hurt, angry, feeling unloved or scared. It’s our job to give them the best start in life and it starts with loving them. I know parenting is hard, I know sometimes you don’t want to be nice when they are stressing you out to the point where you’re about to have a mental breakdown, but we should be sending them to sleep, knowing how loved they are!

Thank you for reading 🙂

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Hi, I'm Laura and welcome to my blog. I'm a thirty-year-old stay-at-home mum of 3, Photography student and horse owner. Here is my life. I like to write about my children, Photography, life lessons, advice, fitness and lots more! Enjoy!

12 thoughts on “Send Your Kids to Bed, Feeling Loved

  1. I’m a father to 2 beautiful girls, the oldest is 2 years old and the youngest is 2 months old. As a parent I, too, sometimes run out of patience, but I remember that I’m their role model. Who they end up with will be someone like me and I want that someone to be amazing because they deserve it. While we don’t necessarily feed them positive energy like you said, we will always read a book before bedtime, the one of her choosing and she absolutely loves it.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for your comment! You’re right. We are their role models. So this morning I woke up to my son playing a recorder outside my room waking me and the baby up, and I snapped at him. And it was wrong to. He’s just being creative. That’s something I will work on. Parenting is hard at times but kids deserve to feel loved and appreciated x

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I love this so much. The meaning of it is so special. Thank you for being open about your own experiences and self awareness. It’s so welcoming to read. Your children are lucky to have you.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I absolutely love this! And 3 kids! I don’t know how you do it! I always think that to have multiple children you must be superwoman! I can barely keep up with a dog and a boyfriend LOL. But I do love this. As a child, my mom and my grandmother always put me to bed with love and affection. I always knew that I was loved, and I think that’s done a lot for me as a person. Sounds like you’re a great mom 🙂

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    1. I’m glad your mom and grandmother gave you that love. It definitely helps your confidence and way of life growing up. Oh gosh yeah having 3 kids is exhausting. I’ve got so wrinkly over the past year due to stressing aha but they are worth it 🙂 xxx

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Ohh I agree with you 100% about feeding them positivity. I am the Mum to two (almost) grown up boys, that are 18 months apart. My eldest was a lively, crazy child and ran everywhere, I swear he never knew how to walk! Like you, I was exhausted at the end of eery day! I know there were days when I wasnt as patient as I should have been, and used to beat myself up about it. But, my boys have grown into kind, confident, outgoing loving boys that I am so proud of. I look at them and think I must have doe something right! You are doing amazing, you sound like a great mum, be kind to yourself xxxx

    Liked by 1 person

  5. From what I’ve read, it seems like you’re doing an amazing job. It’s so easy to get frustrated at times. I don’t have kids but even looking after my little sisters all day leaves me exhausted. But this is food for thought and it is really sad that some kids experience no love. x

    Liked by 1 person

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