Today hasn’t been the best of days. It’s been one of those days where your kids do everything within their power to upset you (not always intentionally) and they win. You let them get the best of you. You break down over anything annoying they do. Then you start crying in hysterics because you just want someone to come and relieve you of your parenting duties for a few days so you can start to feel like yourself again. It’s okay to admit it. We all go through those moments. We all have those emotionally exhausting days. It’s called parenthood and it’s what happens.
I like to think that for the most part I have patience with my kids. After all, I do have three of them. That 3x the annoyance (whenever they are up to no good). So for three of them, I reckon I’m not too crazy (just yet). I try to take deep breaths when they bicker or have meltdowns over absolutely nothing. I count to 10 when I feel myself getting upset at them because I don’t want them to know just how pissed off I am. But most of the time, I’m able to laugh it off. Not everything kids do is “bad”. Sometimes, all they want is a cuddle and for you to tell them that you love them but at that given moment you’re so irritated or overwhelmed that you don’t see that. I try to understand why they are having meltdowns or being impatient. I’m good with them (For the most part). But today, I wasn’t my best. I broke down. I cried. I got angry. I felt like running away. And because that doesn’t happen often, I feel guilty about it. But I know that I’m a good mum and we have those bad days.
So yes, this is just a quick one. To vent about my day. I’m emotionally drained. And really, it wasn’t the worst day I’ve ever had but I just felt anxious about every negative tone that came from their mouths today. JJ was overly emotional this morning after something I said to him. I can’t even remember what it was but I know he wasn’t in trouble and I know I didn’t say anything mean but he took it the wrong way. He then cried the entire car journey which was over an hour, even though I explained to him that I wasn’t angry at him. Then the baby was screaming because that’s just what she does in cars. She hates car rides. I’m very good at handling her upset but today I was just SO overwhelmed with it all and the fact that I was feeling overwhelmed made me get mad at myself, which the kids could sense so they were upset… Arghhh! So, I pulled over, got out of the car and walked behind it and cried. I was so over it!
Izzy was so sweet though. She told me she’s sorry that I’m having a bad day and got out the car to give me a hug, which made me cry even more because it made me realise how lucky I am to have such loving children. EMOTIONS ALL DAY!
Anyway, I’m okay now. I’m just extremely tired. Thanks kids, mummy is KNACKERED! I still love them more than anything though even if they make me want to rip my hair out at times.
Shout out to any other mums out there who are having the same kind of day as I am. We’ve got this!